Psst, don’t look behind you. There is nothing there. It is not that type of watch. It is the kind that Brent has that has “a big hand and a little hand with gloves on it” type.
See, they have watches that for a sideline they tell time. My watch checks to see if my heart is beating. (Pencil, yes some of us are not made of wood with a black core.) Also when I relax and use a couch for it’s intended purpose it has the audacity to tell me to MOVE. If I don’t move there is a bar to tell me what a lazy bum I am. (I don’t need to be told.) I don’t care so much that the watch knows but I am sure it will broadcast that info across the whole Internet. So I get up.
It also has a function for if I went for a run. (It must be for fires and emergencies since why else would anyone run.) It will hook up to a satellite and lie and not give the inflated amount of my workout distance. If I run 5 miles I don’t want a watch squealing on me saying it was only 3.2. Do you?
I am not paranoid but I have to go for someone in a little black case is telling me to MOVE. (Vald, are you done with my new tin foil beret?)
I gotta ask.
How do you keep a watch on over a sock?
John Cameron Swayze showed me how, Brent.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NIwYCD1eUiA
Tried the link; received message video is not available in my country. Does this mean I need to move to a pacific rim country?
Look up “John Cameron Swayze” and “Timex” and you will see the old commercials.
**
(I thought he was wearing a really big belt buckle.)
(That was meant to answer Brent.)
Are you ignoring me, Pencil?
If not, have you ever thought of being a smencil, Pencil?
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B072NCKZ2X/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1505450274&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65
“Scents include: Chocolate, Grape Soda, Mint Chip Ice Cream, Cinnamon Roll, & Blue Rasberry.”
This watch is really helping me get in shape. It is good to have an easy way to monitor my heartbeat. Who would ever thought all this technology would get so small?